Adrian came to counselling many years after his divorce from Trudi, while in his 40s. Athough he has maintained a new relationship of over 10 years with Jean, he was still troubled by events from his first marriage to Trudi. Slowly he came to realise that her behaviour had been extremely manipulative and damaging. From researching online, he developed the belief that Trudi probably had severe narcissistic traits which had a destructive impact on his self-esteem. By carefully tracking the perceived deficits of the parenting he received in his family of origin, which predisposed him to being attracted to Trudi in his 20s, he began to have more compassion for himself and for the traumatic life events that he had suffered, Adrian began to dare to live more bravely by tapping into his considerable creative and artistic talents.

Anna came to therapy after a particularly painful relationship breakup. Counselling helped her realise that when her boundaries had been weak, this had a bad impact on her relationships with men. She also realised that because of the criticism she received in childhood from her parents, she was overly desperate in seeking attention and approval from the men she dated. After some careful conversations, she developed a more centred and healthy way of dating, which led to a more fulfilling relationship not only with her boyfriend but with herself too.

Dealing with a difficult boss was the issue that brought Julie to counselling. As the conversations developed, she began to trust me enough to start talking about the recurring nightmares and flashbacks which were causing her tremendous distress. Trauma-informed therapy supported her in addressing the disturbing memories. Although this process was difficult for Julie, she was committed to processing the intrusive memories so that she could live more fully in the present. She came to accept that the brutal rape was part of her lived history, the memories were more firmly placed in the past, so her future began to look brighter.

Life had improved for Danny: a good job and a new partner. But he was greatly saddened at the low level of contact with his son, who lives with his ex-partner. Legal bills were a costly way to gain more time with his son including overnight stays. Yet he found that therapy helped him be more boundaried in his communication with the mother of his son. This helped him manage the contact arrangements once the court case was over. Not easy, but worth it.